Mar 8, 2008

Leashes at the zoo...and they weren't on the animals!

Aren't these sweet, I have them all around my two trees out front too with purple tulips in between them coming up.
Hunter loves my flowers. He wanted a picture by this pink one.
These crocus flowers are the ones that Hunter just can't stay away from. I only have purple now because all the white and yellow ones got picked by Hunter. I'm pretty confident that after the last episode, he won't be touching them again though. I solved THAT.
Pretending to feed the frog. It's kinda muddy around my flowers right now. I still have to put down bark around them.

We visited the zoo today. There is a tarantula in this cage. Kinda creepy.
Hunter not so sure that the rattlesnake really can't get out. It was moving around and following us with his head.
Pretending he's a biiiiiiig turtle!
Or maybe he's conquering a lizard.
This is how Ainsley felt after our day at the zoo. I am amazed at nine months how tiny she still looks in her seat.

Just a random picture that got stuck in the middle here, but she IS awefully cute isn't she?
Hunter showing how big he is compared to a condor.
The flamingos.
How Ainsley took in the zoo. Riding on Mommy.
I'm almost as big as this python!
And now my blog:
I saw more leashes at the zoo, and they weren't on the animals. They were on the kids. This has been getting me thinking a lot on how Americans in our current culture raise our children. I went to my Mom's group on Friday and a mother with ten children was giving her very wise wisdom on how to get children to obey immediately and with no attitude. Then for about 45 minutes the moms were able to ask her questions on specifics. It amazed me how afraid mothers are to take control and be in control or even know what that looks like. Most of the questions asked I was thinking "well duh" and then I realized that I had the priviledge of being raised in the kind of family where there was no question where the authority was. Two books were recommended "To Raise a Child" and "Don't Make Me Count to Three." Both of which I ordered along with "Shepherding a Child's Heart" on Amazon. I found a lot of "To Raise a Child" online and read it. The funny thing about all three books is that the comments on Amazon were either 5 (this is the best parenting book ever!) or 1 (this is outright child-abuse!). All three were very practical with specifics in lots of situations. Our current culture is so sad and this is why every other family at the zoo had leashes on their children because they can't train them to not run away. Because the way to do that would be child abuse apparently. But I feel that I should be able to train my children to immediate obediance and I shouldn't have to wait to count to three. I have been putting into practice many of the ideas already (I just didn't know it) and I also picked up a couple more which I have been implementing with GREAT results in the last couple of weeks. For example, when I ask Hunter to do something and he says "no" or gives me any other answer but "OK Mommy", I can do a couple of things. First I do not argue back, raise my voice, or let it become a power struggle. I simply say, "Hunter ask me again. I am going to say no and you are going to say OK Mommy in a happy voice." Or I can have him leave the room and come back and try it again the right way. Yesterday I asked him to get his shoes and he got them but groaned and rolled his eyes. I just put them back and told him to try again with a happy voice. It totally worked. We are also talking about how the heart attitude is just as important as them obeying. If it's not done in the right way, try again. I think that since the books advocate spanking in some situations and/or a flip on the mouth for sassiness, many people can't accept it . What's worse? Letting it get out of control until you end up yelling and grabbing your children or swatting at them? To me, what might seem harsh at first is actually kindness. Also, Hunter and I had an absolutely delightful day at the park and zoo enjoying each other, talking, playing, and I did not have to worry at all if he would listen to me or run from me. It freed me up to enjoy him, even with a baby in tow. And yes, he did push boundaries, and yes, I quickly got his obediance. No problem. I'd take him anywhere. Lest I seem like I have it perfect, I don't. Anyone who has read my blog in the last year knows what Hunter has put me through. This does not by any means ensure perfect children. But I do want to make sure that I win each time he acts up. I'm not always consistent, and sometimes I catch myself letting him make it a power struggle. But hopefully, I am learning to stop that and Hunter is learning to obey with a happy heart. And thankfully, I don't need a leash.

1 comment:

  1. well i think you are a great mom & i know i have a lot to learn as paige grows up. thanks for all of your wisdom...*laura*