Sep 6, 2009

I Wanna Be Like Youoooo!

Ever have one of those weeks? Yes, Ainsley has looked like this most of the week. In return my own face has been so patient and cheerful not the most pleasant this week. Though really truly I have made every attempt to be patient. She has hit the terrible twos in full force. This picture was taken right during a huge temper tantrum for which she had to stay in her crib for a while. I believe it was over a shoe...... But in thinking about my responses to her, I am remined who is the adult here and who ultimately should run our home. Not only should I not allow a two year old's tantrum to make me give her what she wants, but also it should not cause me to lose my temper as well. How quickly I feel the temperature rise as she throws the second one hundreth fit for the day. While I don't appreciate the soft, wimpy voices many mothers resort to when they are talking to their suddenly monsterous child as if to show they are so understanding and nice, I also don't feel it's right to completely lose my temper and scream at them either. That soft wimpy nice voice is flat out lying to your child. It's fake because deep down, you really are displeased with their actions. Let them know what they are doing is out of line and that you mean business. However, stay in control. I find that it is so much easier to "arm chair parent" and yell, rather than stop what I am doing, get down in front of them, and firmly handle the problem in a firm voice and follow through with a consequence. I am finding that this is an exercise in discipline for me, because quite often, I am feeling flat out lazy and it's a struggle to make myself stop what I doing and focus on my child. Typically, I have found that if I find myself losing my temper after Hunter asks me for the second one hundredth time for a snack, it's because I didn't stop and effectively handle the request or problem in the first place, but said phrases like, "in a second, Hunter" as I stared at the computer screen without really looking at him. But you know what? Our children are watching our every move. They "wanna be like youooooo!"

I was reminded of this today when I was playing with my new camera lense that I got for my birthday this week. While these pictures aren't the best (as I am still learning the lense and they are pretty soft), going through them was an exercise in parenting. I actually sat and observed my daughter at play through the lense of my camera for quite a while. She was taking care of her baby. Just like me. She was making sure that baby ate every bite of her vegetable. Food fights over what my children eat and when are pretty common in my household. They love to snack all day, and they are pretty picky. Hunter has had some hungry nights lately when he flat out refused to eat what I made for dinner.
She was rocking it, telling it "no no beebee!", cuddling it, blowing it's nose, and showing it flowers.
My all time favorite picture though is the one of her lifting it up and looking down at her dress. She looked at her dress, held the baby out at arms length, and said,

"Mommy, de beebee pooped on my dwess. It's soooo disgwusting. I have to go in now and change her dahper Mommy. Ewww! Disgwusting!"

And that was the end of the photo session as she carried her baby out at arms length back into the house.

Yes, she is watching me parent. What am I modeling for her? Today was a good time for reflection as I watched her play.

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