Mar 24, 2010

Why ask why?

No fancy pictures in this post. Just some thoughts to share that have been mulling around in my head.
I was doing research on the computer on Baby Girl's medical condition, as I do from time to time, and I found a site on Birth Defect Research for Children which catalogs data on birth defects and connects families with other families. Anyhow, the main point of the site was because they said every parent wants to know, "why?" And I sat there stunned for a minute because I realized this has never been a question in my head. I have never asked, "why" and I don't intend to either. Sure, I know the medical explanation for what caused her specific type of tumor (Sacrococcygeal Teratoma), but I have never wondered why MY baby. Why her? I just don't engage in that type of reasoning with God. I trust Him that's why. And that's enough for me.

I am currently engaged in a study on prayer that has been very thought provoking about the way God answers prayer and the way God orchestrates our life. The minute we mention a concern to God, He is swiftly engaged in answering that prayer. We are His children whom He loves more than anything. We don't have to say the right "magic" words, ask it in the right way, or use some special word formula. However, our perception from our upside down point of view is that God is often ignoring us or slow to work or "testing" us somehow, or maybe we didn't ask in just the right way. I prefer to just trust Him than engage in that kind of torturous thought.

Three Bible examples come to mind.

After God showed Joseph that he would bless him above his brothers in dreams, he was sold into slavery, and then thrown in prison. At least 12 years went by before he saw any hope at all, and 20 before seeing his brothers again. But was God just ignoring him the whole time? No God was preparing a way to save his chosen people from starvation.

I think of Hannah who was taunted by the other wife who was able to have many children while she was barren. Now Hannah was ready to be the mother of an ordinary child. A child just like all the other moms around her. But when God was done with her heart, and when God thought the time was right, he gave her a son who would be the best prophet Israel ever had. Hannah got a whole lot more than she had expected or prayed for. There was definite purpose to the waiting.

And then there is Lazareth. Jesus could have easily healed him before he died. But He purposely tarried several days and waited for Lazareth to die and for the house to fill up with mourners. Now many more people would see God's glory and see His power over death as well, rather than just a couple of sisters see God's power over sickness.

So I have never asked God "why" because I feel that I will know when God brings about His purpose and is ready to show me. Maybe the road He chooses for me will be the tougher one for a while, but I trust Him. I've experienced hard lessons in life that don't make sense at the time, but later (sometimes it's been a few years), I realize how much greater good has come from it. I do not say this flippantly. It's a faith carved from an experience in God's ever steady faithfulness to me.

Another thought I have had is that it has been stunning how the tumor has not grown since it was discovered. For about 8 weeks straight now, it has remained the same size, which does not seem to be the norm for this type of tumor from the research I have done. The outpouring of prayer for our little girl has been astounding and touching.

Which brings up another thought. Has the tumor not grown because of all the prayer on her behalf? Does God answer my prayer because more people are praying for her than for maybe other children with this condition? Can I "stack the odds" so to speak with the more people I add to her prayer list? Of course not. God is not manipulated that way or He wouldn't be God. So why ask for all the prayer?

The Bible is clear that all God needs is one intercessor in order for Him to act. But prayer is what connects us to God. It's what makes our relationship with God relational. It's through prayer that God acts and through prayer that we see God's actions and responses to us in the world around us. Can God act without us? Of course, but He loves to work through prayer because He enjoys engaging with us and letting us have a part in what He is doing. God is relational and wants to engage with us.

It is because of this very reason that I ask for prayers. I can pray for our little girl, and I will be the only one who sees God working. Or I can ask for prayers, and now many will see God at work and be engaged in the process of what He is doing in her life. Now others are included in the part God is playing in her and our life, and God can engage with them as well. As the church, we are a "web" so to speak, all connected together and growing with each other as God touches the different spokes of our lives. As we pray for each other, it allows God to touch us all and relate with us in a greater and personal way than if we only prayed and did life in isolation.

So I ask you to pray with us. "O taste and see that the LORD is good; How blessed is the man who takes refuge in Him!" Psalm 34:8

1 comment:

  1. I love this, Jenny! It really helps solidify the study we're doing in real life for you and for me! Thank you for sharing that! :0) Angela Munoz (Bstudy friend!)